Fat Elaine

(Singing) Good morning, Baltimore!

Chris Moses used to live in Baltimore. I visited his ass in Baltimore. The last time I had sex with him was in Baltimore.

I fucking HATE Baltimore. Stupid Inner Harbor SUCKS. And Under Armour can go to hell too! Oh, wait, he QUIT. Monavie can suck my dick.

I still say I look like a fat Elaine in that picture from Sarah's wedding. But go ahead and call me Nikki Blonsky, bitch. You're lucky I love you, Paula!!

Really, I'm lucky you love me.